What doesn’t kill you makes you sign on the dotted line.  Has anybody seen a dotted line on a contract in a while?  I think it’s gone the way of the dinosaur.  The “fine print” however has proven to be more resilient.

What doesn’t kill you makes you cut your nose to spite your face.  This angers your face a great deal primarily due to the meaninglessness of it all and additionally because it hurt.  For days and months your face refuses to even acknowledge that your nose exists making social encounters quite awkward.  When finally your nose heals there is a thaw.  Feelings and emotions are repaired and life goes on as it should and everyone is happy.  Yes, face is saved when it remembers the age old saying…you can pick your friends, but you can’t pick your nose.

What doesn’t kill you makes you happily make mud pies.  What does kill you is eating them.  They’re made of mud dammit!

What doesn’t kill you makes you consider the environment before printing an email.

What doesn’t kill you makes you grow a huge set of stones.  Kidney…not the other kind.

What doesn’t kill you makes you insubordinate.  You find this impossible to believe and frankly, just won’t accept it.

What doesn’t kill you makes you flame retardant.  Just, uh, don’t put this to the test.

What doesn’t kill you makes you suggest otherwise.  In all things at all times.  If someone has an opinion…suggest otherwise.  If they have a recommendation…suggest otherwise.  If there’s a preference…suggest otherwise.  The right person for the job…otherwise.  Would you like soup or salad?  Otherwise.  I think I’m onto something here.

What doesn’t kill you makes you wishy washy.  Or is it washy wishy?  I can never decide.

What doesn’t kill you makes you do as the Oompa Loompas do.  Doopa Dee Do & Doopa Dee Dee, insert your own rhyme here for free.